📚 Sweating Bullets: Notes about Inventing PowerPoint

Finished reading Sweating Bullets: Notes about Inventing PowerPoint by Robert Gaskins. I’m a big fan of dissections of all things pop, and although the topic of this book isn’t quite the same as a music documentary or a look back at 1980s UK TV programmes, the backstory of PowerPoint is in the same wheelhouse for me. It’s played a big role in my life and feels like a part of mainstream culture. The book scratched exactly the same itch.

The author was hired by Forethought, Inc. in 1984 as Vice President of Product Development, a year after the company was founded. The company had investors but little direction, and needed a reboot. Gaskins brought into the company his idea of developing a tool for creating both overhead transparencies and 35mm slides for the nascent GUI-based desktop computer platforms, Macintosh, Windows and OS/2, some of which hadn’t been released yet. His view was that commodity personal computers would get better over time and that these GUI-based platforms would be the future. Throughout the book, it becomes clear that this belief and his strong views on what platforms to develop for (and not develop for) and in what order were core components of the product’s success. PowerPoint for Windows only started to outsell its Macintosh counterpart in 1991; Windows took so long to gain traction that early versions of Excel and Word were shipping with Windows runtimes included as there was no expectation that the consumer would have Windows already installed on their computer.

Gaskins’ father knew many people in the audio-visual industry who were able to give him insight into how many overheads and 35mm slides were created every year. This data wasn’t widely known or available to people in the technology industry, but it helped to make the business case for the software product which eventually became PowerPoint.

In his previous roles, he travelled around the world and received pitch decks from many vendors. He collected the handout versions of the slides, building a library that served as input into the functionality that the software required:

They were made in all kinds of ways—handwritten, on a typewriter, drawn on an old pen plotter, or made on many kinds of large computers. But I was struck by how they were very much the same all over the world. The basic style was essentially uniform everywhere, indicating that there was an international style for overheads. This meant that a single application to make presentation visuals would be saleable worldwide.

Overheads and 35mm slides were originally two very different paradigms. Overheads were usually created by the person presenting them, sometimes in the meeting itself. (I sat in many classrooms and lecture theatres where the person leading the room wrote directly on a scroll of transparent film as they went.) It was a lights-on approach that invited discussion and narrative. In contrast, 35mm slides were usually professionally created, typically by a company such as Genigraphics, and would be presented in a darkened room. I started work in 1999 and never saw an overhead projector in a corporate setting. I also never saw a 35mm slide presentation; the transition had already happened. Through PowerPoint, both of these formats collapsed into the same thing and ultimately became something new — ‘slides’ delivered through video screens. Arguably this has directly led to some of the ‘Death by PowerPoint’ narrative, where some people deliver their presentations with slide after slide filled with tons of information.

The application, initially developed for Macintosh to create black-and-white slides that could be printed and transferred to transparencies for overhead projection, was originally called ‘Presenter’. The name ‘PowerPoint’ came to Gaskins while he was in the shower one morning, the place where many good ideas are born, about three months before the product was released to the public.

Although PowerPoint and applications like it, such as Google Slides and Apple’s Keynote, are ubiquitous now, during the late 1980s the idea wasn’t obvious to everyone. Gaskins had to “pitch the idea repeatedly, hundreds of times, without getting much response, and to keep refining the idea in the face of prolonged skepticism.” He even had to lobby Apple to let the application run in full-screen mode, as it was against their own design guidelines at the time.

One of the most fascinating insights was how you don’t (or, perhaps more correctly, he didn’t) need to closely guard your plans. He went from trying to keep it a secret to telling everyone, and didn’t need to worry about someone else developing the idea too. I wonder if this is still true today, given how quickly information travels in the Internet age.

In the early months of working on PowerPoint, I felt very protective about the idea; it seemed so obviously great that anyone who heard of it would copy it immediately. Over the three years of pitching the idea hundreds of times, I more or less came to the opposite conclusion: that no one would want to copy it, and I would talk about it to almost anyone for a business reason.

In those days, I first heard a line attributed to Howard Aiken (designer of IBM’s Harvard Mark I computer during World War II):

“Don’t worry about people stealing your ideas. If your ideas are any good, you’ll have to ram them down people’s throats.”

[…]

The ideas that everyone recognizes immediately as worth stealing are going to be just barely in front of the current commercial frontier and can’t be successfully stolen quickly enough, while an idea just a little further away in time will seem to have objections that make it appear a bad idea to most people.

On the journey to releasing PowerPoint 1.0, Forethought went through very tough times. For three years in a row, the management teams only allowed staff a week off over Christmas once they had calculated that they had enough cash to get through the period as well as to pay minimal severances if they had to liquidate in the New Year.

Gaskins looks back to a time when the final ‘golden master’ build of the software was critical. There were no automatic updates via the Internet, so it had to be as complete and bug-free as possible in order to avoid costly recalls and reissuing of the application on a new set of disks, something that could put a small company out of business. The whole concept of creating a ‘minimum viable product’ and getting software into the hands of users as quickly as possible in order to get feedback just wasn’t a thing. It’s the total opposite of the evergreen nature of application software today. As I sit and type this, my iPhone has three apps that are ready to install an update and 15 that have already updated today. If any of these updates introduces a bug, it can simply be patched with another update, probably without me even knowing about it. The process of creating the ‘golden master’ sounds a lot like pressing a vinyl record:

When the creation of precisely one perfect disk was verified, this became the “Golden Master.” Quality Assurance would hand-deliver this master to manufacturing. At the manufacturing plant, the single master received would be used only on specialized duplicating machines to make further masters, called “silvers”; the Golden Master was then locked up in a secure cabinet. The silver masters were used on duplicating machines to manufacture product disks, which were verified against silvers. If more silvers were needed, they were made from the unique Golden Master. Golden Masters were never de-accessioned, but remained permanently in secure storage, so later questions about what was on them could always be answered with assurance. The whole Golden Master process helped to prevent errors, and also made it easy to assign responsibility for any mistakes discovered in products.

But they added some ceremonial steps, as quoted from Dennis Austin, the original architect and developer of the software:

“We first recognized that two people were required to do the work. One would follow the steps on paper and the other carry out the instructions. The two would monitor one another’s actions to be sure no one slipped up. (The two people were generally Bob and I.) We donned special robes to signify that we were engaged in a solemn rite. (Our robes were actually some old purple T-shirts from Bell-Northern Research, but it’s the idea that’s important.) Step by step we soberly followed the instructions to guarantee the perfection of our master.”

Gaskins adds:

The precautions we took were extreme, but so were the risks. In fact, we never made a mistake in preparing a Golden Master. In later years, the same ceremonial rituals (including wearing special costumes) were taught to everyone in the GBU [Graphics Business Unit] who made masters, eventually usually a pair consisting of a Program Manager and a Quality Assurance Engineer, and our perfect record continued.

There are some lovely technical details about how the software worked. The computers of the mid-1980s didn’t yet have true multitasking capability. The ‘slide sorter’ feature, which allowed you to interact with small thumbnail representations of the slides in the deck, created them in the background when PowerPoint was idle, with the routine constantly checking for user input. If it detected any, the process would be abandoned.

In the days before version control systems such as Git, working with multiple developers on a project was non-trivial. After the company hired Tom Rudkin to join Dennis Austin in development, the team of two bought a wall rack that was typically used to hold punch cards for employees clocking in and out. Each card represented a file in the code base; if you wanted to modify it, you would take the card from the rack to your office, and then add details of your changes to the card when you were ready to upload the updated file to the server.

Gaskins covers the hand-porting of clip art from the Genigraphics library into files compatible with Windows. They thought that this would be a useful income stream for Genigraphics; it cost Microsoft USD 250,000, but took place at a time when everyone started producing clip art and end-user prices were racing to the bottom. The main legacy was the preservation of this artwork that might otherwise have been lost to obscurity as the use of PowerPoint and the rise of self-produced video slide projections eventually forced Genigraphics out of business.

Forethought represented a first for both Apple and Microsoft — the first company that Apple’s Strategic Investment Group took a stake in, and the first company that Microsoft bought outright, for USD 14m in 1987, a number that feels like a rounding error today. At the time of the Microsoft sale, they were simultaneously considering an IPO of the company, but given the stock market crash of Black Monday and subsequent poor environment in which to go public, they made the right choice.

The deal to join Microsoft didn’t include the need for Forethought staff to relocate to Redmond, Washington, where Microsoft’s headquarters are based. Instead, the team were allowed to stay in Silicon Valley. The geographic distance probably also played a part in them keeping a logical and procedural distance. They were allowed to operate somewhat autonomously, including not being forced to use the internal Microsoft software development tools. I love the insight about how Gaskins assumed responsibility for things:

Early in September, we had a couple of very senior Human Relations people come down from Redmond to explain recruiting to us and answer any other HR questions in an all-hands meeting. Someone from the GBU asked about signing authorities, and one of the Microsoft HR people explained to our group that “BillG is the ultimate authority for everything in Redmond, and in the same way, BobGa [me—Microsoft people often talked in email aliases] is the ultimate authority for everything in Silicon Valley.” When I heard that, I realized that I should take exactly that attitude, about everything, until I was challenged on something. I already understood that how much authority you have in any business largely depends on how much authority you assume you have. I had started out by being a bit tentative, while finding out how Microsoft worked, but no one in Redmond seemed to be trying to tell me what to do—at all. I should start immediately to assume all the authority I could, however unreasonable it might seem.

He also has some nuggets of wisdom about hiring. Bill Gates encouraged him to never hire a less-than-great person, no matter how desperate the team is to fill the role — this is something I’ve tried to practise myself for many years. Interestingly, Gates also said to never fail to hire a great person, whether there is budgeted headcount or not; this one I would struggle much more with in the companies I have worked for. Gaskins also notes that he felt strongly that he should never hire anyone into a role that had no significant internal career path; these jobs should be outsourced to companies that did have career paths for people in these roles.

The book covers how Microsoft changed between the Forethought acquisition in 1987 and Gaskins’ departure in 1993. During this time, the company increased in size from 1,200 to 12,000 staff. Once it was released for Windows, PowerPoint was soon bundled with Excel and Word to create the first version of Microsoft Office. However, it was credited with only 12% of the revenue from the bundle, with the two others receiving 44% each. Microsoft said this split was based on historical sales, but Gaskins believes it was due to the larger sizes of their teams and the lobbying by their team leaders, made easier through their proximity to decision-makers in Redmond.

Gaskins writes wistfully about how meetings and presentations have changed during his lifetime. Giving a pitch in the mid-1980s involved creating slides, but they would typically be accompanied by a written document and spreadsheets that gave the detail. By the end of the first decade of the 2000s, people like Marc Andreessen and investment firms such as Sequoia Capital were asking for no more than 20 slides for a pitch, without any accompanying material.

There is some repetition in the book, but I didn’t get bored, particularly where the author covers the differences between types of presentation at the time that PowerPoint was released.

Gaskins left Microsoft in 1993 after PowerPoint 3.0 was released. He considered the product to be “finished”. I know what he means, but as a long-time PowerPoint user, I can definitely say that some small improvements since then have made a massive difference. For example, Smart Guides that appear when dragging objects, allowing you to quickly align the components of a slide, eliminated many hours of nudging and distributing objects into place. The innovative move to Office Open XML formats such as .pptx and .pptm means that I can’t remember the last time one of my PowerPoint files got into an unrecoverable pickle.

If computing culture is your thing, this is an excellent read. I really enjoyed it.

📚 Indie Microblogging

I’ve just finished reading Indie Microblogging by Manton Reece. This book covers a lot of ground, including plenty of detail on the philosophy behind the Micro.blog platform, as well as broader IndieWeb thinking more generally. Reading about these ideas a few years ago, and setting up an account on Micro.blog, helped me get back into a regular blogging habit after a long period lost to posting directly to social media. The book is free, and well worth reading if you are curious about having a place where your thoughts to live in public that is truly your own. If you’re already doing that, there are some good details and links on how the IndieWeb tools can be used to make the web itself one giant social network.

The book has made me think a lot about my relationship with social media. Over the past week, I’ve spent time browsing blog posts directly on sites that I’ve found interesting. It felt so much more rewarding than scrolling through an endless stream of posts on Bluesky or Mastodon. It was more like dipping in and out of a book. There was much less news, but I felt as though I got to know a little bit about the person behind each site. Even using my feed reader, a quieter way to consume information, isn’t the same as reading through the old posts on someone’s site. This is how it used to feel in the early days when blogs first appeared on the Internet. The good news is that it never went away; blogs and websites were just drowned out by the clamour of attention from social media. You can choose to move your attention back to the web.

The Micro.blog platform is both a fully-fledged blog host and a layer of interaction between blogs. It has been put together with such thoughtfulness and care, as Reece outlines in this book. Features that would drive engagement have been ignored when they are considered harmful to users in the long term. Discovery is filled with friction, and there is no popularity contest for likes and reposts. It’s all very deliberate.

When we launched Micro.blog, we got pushback on the lack of likes and reposts and follower lists and trends and global firehose. Eight years later, I’m confident our approach is an important niche on the social web. We do lose customers who drift away because of lack of engagement. So be it. If they want the dopamine hit of notifications and a more active timeline, pulling them back in, there is literally every other platform for that.

This is a worthwhile read if you are even remotely interested in blogging, or trying to step away from publishing your thoughts and posts on other people’s platforms.

📚 Faithful Ruslan

Finished reading Faithful Ruslan by Georgi Vladimov. Published in 1975 in West Germany, it is the story of the closure of a Soviet prison camp in the late 1950s, told from the perspective of one of the camp’s guard dogs. The foreword to the first English edition, written by Michael Glenny, gives just the right amount of context. I went back and re-read the foreword after finishing the book in order to understand the events and characters a little better.

At the end of World War II, Stalin imprisoned all returning Soviet prisoners of war as well as civilians who had been deported to work in Germany during the war. Most hadn’t committed any crimes. In the year after the 20th Congress of the Soviet Communist Party in 1956, “an estimated eight million prisoners were released from the camps, and about six million who had perished there were ‘posthumously rehabilitated.’” The camps were brutal; Glenny says:

Soviet prison regulations stated that at temperatures below −40 °C prisoners could not be made to do outdoor work, but this rule was not always observed by prison-camp commandants.

However, the book doesn’t focus much on the experience of the prisoners beyond the picture you create in your mind through the eyes of the dog.

The closure of the camp is confusing to Ruslan and his colleagues, animals who had spent their whole lives in the service of the Soviet guards. The story follows his life after the camp lets the dogs go.

It’s an excellent novella and you really feel that you are inside Ruslan’s head.

📚 How to Do Nothing: Resisting the Attention Economy

Finished reading How to Do Nothing: Resisting The Attention Economy by Jenny Odell.

Early in the book the author herself says that:

…you’ll find that this book is a bit oddly shaped. The arguments and observations I’ll make here are not neat, interlocking parts in a logical whole. Rather, I saw and experienced many things during the course of writing it—things that changed my mind and then changed it again, and which I folded in as I went. I came out of this book different than I went in. So, consider this not a closed transmission of information, but instead an open and extended essay, in the original sense of the word (a journey, an essaying forth). It’s less a lecture than an invitation to take a walk.

And that’s how it felt as I read it. ‘Doing nothing’ is defined by the author as disengaging from the attention economy, and there are some profound reflections here. As I read the book, I found myself consciously trying to be more aware of my surroundings, and particularly the people within them. I had the feeling that I had stopped noticing everyday things, and just through reading about the author’s experiences I felt more tuned into them. Which is exactly what she described happening to herself on a number of occasions as she wrote the book:

Last week, after a meeting, I took the F streetcar from Civic Center to the Ferry Building in San Francisco. It’s a notoriously slow, crowded, and halting route, especially in the middle of the day. This pace, added to my window seat, gave me a chance to look at the many faces of the people on Market Street with the same alienation as the slow scroll of Hockney’s Yorkshire Landscapes. Once I accepted the fact that each face I looked at (and I tried to look at each of them) was associated with an entire life—of birth, of childhood, of dreams and disappointments, of a universe of anxieties, hopes, grudges, and regrets totally distinct from mine—this slow scene became almost impossibly absorbing. As Hockney said: “There’s a lot to look at.” Even though I’ve lived in a city most of my adult life, in that moment I was floored by the density of life experience folded into a single city street.

Odell has also got me thinking about the crazy level of context-switching within a social media feed. It keeps things trivial and without any depth:

For example, let’s take a look at my Twitter feed right now, as I’m sitting inside my studio in Oakland in the summer of 2018. Pressed up against each other in neat rectangles, I see the following:

  • An article on Al Jazeera by a woman whose cousin was killed at school by ISIL
  • An article about the Rohingya Muslims fleeing Myanmar last year
  • An announcement that @dasharezøne (a joke account) is selling new T-shirts
  • Someone arguing for congestion pricing in Santa Monica, California
  • Someone wishing happy birthday to former NASA worker Katherine Johnson
  • A video of NBC announcing the death of Senator McCain and shortly afterward cutting to people dressed as dolphins appearing to masturbate onstage
  • Photos of Yogi Bear mascot statues dumped in a forest
  • A job alert for director of the landscape architecture program at Morgan State University
  • An article on protests as the Pope visits Dublin
  • A photo of a yet another fire erupting, this time in the Santa Ana Mountains
  • Someone’s data visualization of his daughter’s sleeping habits during her first year
  • A plug for someone’s upcoming book about the anarchist scene in Chicago
  • An Apple ad for Music Lab, starring Florence Welch

Spatial and temporal context both have to do with the neighboring entities around something that help define it. Context also helps establish the order of events. Obviously, the bits of information we’re assailed with on Twitter and Facebook feeds are missing both of these kinds of context. Scrolling through the feed, I can’t help but wonder: What am I supposed to think of all this? How am I supposed to think of all this? I imagine different parts of my brain lighting up in a pattern that doesn’t make sense, that forecloses any possible understanding. Many things in there seem important, but the sum total is nonsense, and it produces not understanding but a dull and stupefying dread.

I can’t remember the last time that a book had such an impact on my everyday existence, making me take stock of my approach to the things I consume and how I behave as I go throughout my day. I am not sure how much I want to radically change — I’m not about to stop listing to podcasts as I wander — but it has made me more aware of what I’m doing.

Serendipitously, as I read the book I also came across Derek Sivers’ About page where he writes about his approach to how he spends his time, which felt as though it made a connection Odell’s writing. He says:

I hate to waste a single hour. I feel the precious value of time, most of the time. I imagine my time as worth $1000 an hour, and ask myself what’s worth $1000. Watching a TV show? Absolutely not. (“Game of Thrones” was 70 hours, so would have cost $70,000 to watch.) Social media? Absolutely not. Focused learning or creating? Yep! Being with my kid? Always.

I don’t think I will ever be able to take the same approach. I do like some downtime, where I am enjoying things just because I enjoy them, and seem to get a good balance between being productive and recharging my batteries. Watching TV with my wife is a thing we’ve grown into doing together and I love it, so I’m not going to give that up. But I do understand and agree with the sentiment. Life is too short to spend on things that don’t bring you joy or, in your own opinion, are a waste of time. And your time and attention are exactly what the modern ‘social media’ platforms are tuned to exploit.

📚 Fearless Speech

I recently finished reading Fearless Speech: Breaking Free from the First Amendment by Mary Anne Franks. There’s a lot in this book. The central thesis is the author reframing the concept of ‘free speech’ into:

  • Fearless speech, where a person speaking ’truth to power’, despite risks to themselves from doing so, and
  • Reckless speech, where the person speaking puts other people in danger, typically those with less power than themselves.
“A president who uses speech to attack a citizen, for example, as Trump did repeatedly while president, is not engaged in fearless speech. Powerful figures who use speech to attack less powerful figures are often instead engaging in reckless speech, creating a substantial and unjustified risk of harm to the person they target.” — from Fearless Speech by Mary Anne Franks

Franks looks at two key texts that are often referred to in today’s world by people who claim to be ‘defending free speech’. The first and most famous example is the First Amendment to the United States Constitution. Here’s the full text:

Congress shall make no law respecting an establishment of religion, or prohibiting the free exercise thereof; or abridging the freedom of speech, or of the press; or the right of the people peaceably to assemble, and to petition the Government for a redress of grievances.

The First Amendment restricts what the Government can do to curtail freedom of speech. It has absolutely nothing to do with public or private companies, and doesn’t dictate what they can and cannot do. When we look at social media platforms, for example, there is no obligation under the First Amendment to allow their users to post anything they like without moderation in order to preserve their ‘free speech rights’.

In fact, the law says that these platforms can moderate their content. The second key text referred to in the book is Section 230 of the Communications Act of 1934, enacted as part of the Communications Decency Act of 1996. People who have heard of ‘Section 230’ may generally be aware that it stops platforms from being treated as publishers. Platforms are not responsible for anything horrible that their users post. This is in contrast to traditional media. Newspaper owners, for example, are liable for the content on their pages. However, Section 230 also includes a ‘Good Samaritan clause’. In the same way that someone acting in good faith to try to resuscitate a stranger who has had a suspected cardiac arrest is not liable if they break that person’s rib when they administer CPR, platforms are immune from liability if they act in good faith by removing harmful or obscene content from their platform. The relevant text is here:

47 U.S. Code § 230 – Protection for private blocking and screening of offensive material

(b) Policy
It is the policy of the United States—

(4) to remove disincentives for the development and utilization of blocking and filtering technologies that empower parents to restrict their children’s access to objectionable or inappropriate online material; and
(5) to ensure vigorous enforcement of Federal criminal laws to deter and punish trafficking in obscenity, stalking, and harassment by means of computer.

(c) Protection for “Good Samaritan” blocking and screening of offensive material
(1) Treatment of publisher or speaker
No provider or user of an interactive computer service shall be treated as the publisher or speaker of any information provided by another information content provider.
(2) Civil liability
No provider or user of an interactive computer service shall be held liable on account of—
(A) any action voluntarily taken in good faith to restrict access to or availability of material that the provider or user considers to be obscene, lewd, lascivious, filthy, excessively violent, harassing, or otherwise objectionable, whether or not such material is constitutionally protected; or
(B) any action taken to enable or make available to information content providers or others the technical means to restrict access to material described in paragraph (1).

So, not only do corporations not have an obligation to let people say whatever they like on their platforms, there is even legal protection for them to remove ‘bad’ content. Hosting hate speech is therefore a choice, not an obligation under some notion of ‘free speech’.

The book was published in October 2024, prior to the most recent Presidential election. Events from Trump’s first term as president are referred to throughout the book, and I suspect that there could easily be a bumper second edition just based on what has happened in the six months since publication.

In January, Mark Zuckerberg announced that Meta will scale back their content moderation on Facebook and Instagram, leaving much of the work of fact-checking and flagging objectionable content to their users. It’s very convenient and beneficial for Meta to have more ‘free speech’ and less moderation on their platform as it drives engagement. From the book:

Doing nothing is always cheaper than helping, and harmful content can be very profitable. As long as tech platforms are allowed to enjoy the benefits of doing business without any of the burdens, they will have little incentive to take care and every incentive to be reckless in their pursuit of profit.

It must first be noted that whether an online platform leaves content up or takes it down, it makes a choice—there is no neutral position. Platforms already make choices about whether to leave content up or take it down, and they make that choice primarily based on their corporate bottom line.

Trump’s election victory, and the administration’s rhetoric on ‘free speech’, has given Zuckerberg the cover he needs to dial down the moderation and dial up the angry exchanges on his platforms. More eyeballs, more clicks, more monetisation, all under the cover of being a champion of free speech. But the action of a private company has nothing to do with the First Amendment as defined in the constitution. Franks calls it ‘consumerist constitutionalism’:

This consumerist constitutionalism—the conflation of a commercial product with a constitutional right—serves corporate interests in multiple ways. First, given the deep emotional attachment Americans have to their constitutional rights, convincing them that they need a particular product in order to exercise those rights is sure to be a lucrative enterprise. This is especially true if the public believes that they are always on the verge of losing those rights and that the only way to avert this crisis is to consume more of the product. Consumerist constitutionalism leads individuals to not only acquire but also to identify with certain products and services, creating an endowment effect that makes any interference with access feel like an existential threat.

Not all ‘free speech’ is equal in the eyes of the Trump administration. Peaceful protests on university campuses about the war in Gaza are a form of free speech that are clearly protected in the First Amendment. Government intervention to shut them down is the opposite. Members and supporters of the administration preach free speech but this is blatant hypocrisy, as this recent Jon Stewart piece on The Daily Show illustrates. Watch from 3m11s in:

The book’s distinction between ‘fearless speech’ and ‘reckless speech’ is incredibly insightful, and has stayed with me as a way of looking at the actions of people speaking out. Every year, on International Women’s Day (IWD), I look forward to reading Sharon O’Dea’s comments on LinkedIn. She comments on posts from well-known organisations where they celebrate IWD in some fashion, calling them out with data and facts about how they are really doing. Sharon has a form where people can submit stories about their companies anonymously so that she can follow up with research ahead of their IWD posts.

Here she is responding to Foxtons, Metro Bank, and Rio Tinto. This year, I found myself thinking about these comments for longer than usual. Shamefully, perhaps, one of my first thoughts when I read them was something along the lines of, “Doesn’t Sharon sell her freelance services to companies like these?” It makes what she’s doing even more poignant. This is fearless speech. I’m not as brave as she is.

I’ve barely scratched the surface in this post of what is covered by this book. I’m going to be thinking about it for a very long time.

📚 Fascism

A few weeks ago I was making my way into work, catching up with the overnight news of Donald Trump’s second inauguration. Things that Trump did on inauguration day had a whiff of fascism. But seeing Elon Musk make multiple Nazi salutes on stage left me aghast. It fascinated me to see people and institutions bend over backwards to accommodate alternative interpretations of what Musk did, including the Anti-Defamation League which said “It seems that @elonmusk made an awkward gesture in a moment of enthusiasm, not a Nazi salute“, and Benjamin Netanyahu, prime minister of Israel, who said that Musk “is being falsely smeared“. It’s as if calling it what it clearly was — a fascist salute — would cross a line.

I had an interesting conversation with a friend who didn’t see the Musk gesture in the same way. However, in our discussion he suggested that people going to jail in the UK for what they said on social media was fascist. I wasn’t so sure. Believing in ‘free speech’ as a principle doesn’t necessarily mean you get to say anything you like to anyone whenever you feel like it. There have to be rules. I’m definitely not a free-speech absolutist. As I wrote in my recent weeknotes:

At the forefront of my mind this week was the concept of free speech, given the widely-reported changes at Meta. A conversation with a friend and a Stratechery post by Ben Thompson challenged my thinking, which led me to try to find resources that would help me to refine my understanding. I’ve bought Regulating Free Speech in a Digital Age by David Bromell as recommended by Heather Burns, as well as Fearless Speech by Mary Anne Franks. I lean towards free speech, but having this week learned about the paradox of tolerance, I know that I’m not a ‘free speech absolutist’. But I don’t know where or how the line should be drawn.

On one level, putting people in prison for writing a post on Twitter or Facebook seems extreme. But it doesn’t seem right that people can publish posts encouraging others to burn down hotels and religious buildings without consequence. Is jailing people for their posts fascist? I didn’t think so. But I wasn’t completely sure.

By chance, I saw that Ian Dunt and Dorian Lynskey had posted an ‘emergency’ episode of their Origin Story podcast, called Trump’s inauguration: Can we call it fascism yet? The fact that the title was pitched as a question, while the image for the episode is a picture of Elon Musk doing his Nazi salute, shows that this wasn’t something straightforward to answer. On the podcast, Ian Dunt decided that yes, we can call this fascism, and explained why:

Dorian Lynskey: …it has to be said that Elon Musk throwing what appears to be a fascist salute more than once doesn’t require the historian Richard J. Evans to decode that one. Ian, obviously one does not like to be hysterical about this. We were talking about how not to cry fascism and everything. What did you make of the inauguration?

Ian Dunt: Oh, I would really like to cry fascism now.

DL: OK.

ID: I mean, there’s a certain… I know that you’ve discovered that apparently the frog’s in water and it’s bollocks, and apparently the frog does jump out of the water, but you do sort of feel because it’s like an everyday degree by degree by degree increase, you feel trapped by it. There is a point when you have to take a step back or deal with… I mean, I could do all of this list with Trump, obviously, but you have to do it with Musk. It’s like just over the last couple of months, this is a guy that is explicitly telling people, go out and vote and support Tommy Robinson, Alternative for Deutschland, extremist street thugs. These are the people who support him. He’s interacting with far right accounts. He’s using all of the modern day online far right imagery, Pepe the Frog and all of his nonsense monikers that he’s adopted. The accounts that he interacts with, the conspiracy theories that he spreads, they’re all on the far right. So then when he gets up and repeatedly does something that looks like a Nazi salute, if that was someone else, if it was George Bush who did it, you’d think like, “he got that all funny and it came out weird and don’t be weird about it.” But it takes so much generosity that you have really reached the point of being fundamentally irrational to not interpret it in this way, given the series of actions that led up to it. Years ago, when we did our episode on fascism, we were like, you need the alarm to be pulled when things get really sketchy. Well, to me, honestly, yesterday, that’s what really sketchy looks like.

The episode also had a reading from their most recent Origin Story book, called Fascism, which sounded exactly like what I was looking for. So I picked up a copy and dived in.

The book explores fascism primarily through the history of the two classic examples where it was indisputably how the countries were run — Italy under Mussolini (whose political party was literally called the Partito Nazionale Fascista, the National Fascist Party) and Germany under Hitler. There is general consensus that these were both fascist dictatorships, but they were very different to each other. Part of the problem with calling anything ‘fascist’ today is that you are immediately drawing a comparison to these two regimes, both of which precipitated extreme suffering through their actions in World War II:

If you invoke 1930s Germany to criticise a draconian right-wing policy, you will be widely understood. But if, for the sake of accuracy, you reference modern Hungary, 1970s Chile, 1940s Spain, or even 1920s Italy, most people will not have any idea what you are talking about. This narrow band of shared knowledge erases most of the history of authoritarianism and creates a false binary: either a country is a healthy, tolerant democracy or it is on the road to Nazism. The vast middle ground must be understood, now more than ever, because that is where the populists operate. Even if we are in the business of sounding the red alert about them, we must have a sense of the precise threat they pose if we are to effectively challenge them.

Using the word ‘fascist’ for something ‘less’ than Nazi Germany seems to either be too over-the-top, or has the effect of diluting the meaning and impact of the word. (This is echoed by Dorian Lynskey’s tentative approach in the podcast episode to the question of whether to “cry fascism” or not about Trump and Musk.)

And now, in the early twenty-first century, we seem surrounded by figures who can’t reliably be called fascists but who trade in similar feelings and inspire similar anxieties in their opponents. That makes us want to call them fascists – to shake people by the collar and tell them that we’ve played this game before and it did not end well. But it deprives us of the confidence to do so, because we’re never quite sure if we’re using the word correctly, or if deploying it will make us look like hysterics.

But trying to pin down exactly what we mean by fascism is inherently difficult. It isn’t the same as other ideologies:

There is no flawless, objective test for fascism. This is not due to any weakness in scholarly analysis, but to the weakness of fascism itself. We can define socialism very easily, as the collective ownership of the means of production. We can define liberalism as the belief in the freedom of the individual. That is because these are both meaningful political traditions with a huge body of intellectual contributions. We struggle to define fascism because it is not a meaningful political tradition and it has few, if any, intellectual contributions.

The authors suggest that something does not need to be ‘fully fascist’ for the word, or a derivative of it, to be useful in pointing out something that is on the road to fascism:

One solution is semantic: terms that allude to someone or something having fascist elements without necessarily satisfying the full definition. President Biden referred to Trump’s philosophy as ‘semi-fascism’, a term also used by the historian Stanley Payne. There are many other variants: proto-fascism, quasi-fascism or borderline fascism. And there is the term ‘fascistic’, to describe a particular element of a populist movement. These phrases can seem slightly cowardly and evasive, but they’re actually very helpful. They provide options. They let you point to worrying elements of a movement or party without having to go all the way. They add nuance while retaining the capacity for historical comparison and political warning.

The rise of populism across the worldis something to be concerned with in the same way that we should have been concerned about the rise of fascism in the 1920s and 1930s:

Fascism and populism share a conceptual root. They both feature an all-encompassing insistence on the ‘will of the people’ as the only source of political legitimacy, unlike liberalism, which places a strong emphasis on individual rights, diversity and the separation of powers.

Ultimately, there is no easy checklist that you can use to define whether something is fascist, although Umberto Eco tried with his list of the 14 common features of fascism.

This, then, is the moral lesson of the story of fascism. It is not necessarily about precise definitions, or watertight checklists, or strictly policed usage. It is about recognising that fascism appeals to some of the darkest instincts of human nature: the hatred of difference, the yearning for order, the sublimation of the individual to the group, the enchantment of violence. At heart, Orwell suggested, fascism meant ‘something cruel, unscrupulous, arrogant, obscurantist . . . almost any English person would accept “bully” as a synonym for “Fascist”’. The story of fascism shows us what happens when these instincts are given free rein and reach their ultimate expression. It therefore serves as a reminder to treat with extreme vigilance any individual or group that seeks to encourage those ideas, and to dedicate oneself to stopping them.

Having read the book, I don’t see how jailing people for social media posts that incite hatred and violence can be considered to be fascist. Being the bully, hating the differences that refugees, asylum seekers, people of colour or LGBTQ+ people represent and promoting violence towards them is fascist. For a tolerant society to thrive, paradoxically my belief is that it needs to be intolerant of this kind of world view and behaviour.

John Malathronas

Yesterday I was searching Bluesky for the people that I started following and chatting to back in the early days of Twitter. It was jarring to learn that one of them had recently passed away.

My wife and I were given a copy of John Malathronas’ Brazil: Life, Blood, Soul in 2004, just before we headed off there on our honeymoon. It’s a great read, and I ploughed through it just before we set off on our trip. Five years later, his very distinctive name caught my eye in an internal chatroom at work; it turned out that he was working as a database developer, and we were sitting just a few desks away from each other in the same office. I left the company soon afterwards, but over the next few years we talked a bit on Twitter. He came across as fun, gregarious and full of self confidence. Mary Novakovich’s eulogy makes me wish that I’d got to know him a little more.

📚 Monsters: A Fan’s Dilemma

I recently finished reading Monsters: A Fan’s Dilemma by Claire Dederer, a wonderful exploration of the question of ‘what do we do with great art by bad people?’

It’s a perennial topic. It comes up in conversation at our monthly Album Club all the time. Is there something about society — us — somehow weighing the quality of the work against the wrongdoing of the artist, reaching a verdict of whether the art can still be enjoyed?

The book explores different angles through a number of public figures: Roman Polanski, Woody Allen, Michael Jackson, J. K. Rowling, Pablo Picasso, Ernest Hemingway, Richard Wagner, Virginia Woolf, Willa Cather, Vladimir Nabokov (wrote fiction about monsters, with no evidence that he actually was one), Carl Andre, Ana Mendieta (died after falling from her apartment window during an argument with her husband, the aforementioned Carl Andre), Doris Lessing, Joni Mitchell, Valerie Solanas, Sylvia Plath, Raymond Carver and Miles Davis.

As much as the book is about problematic characters, it is also about the audience and each person’s response to an artist’s work:

Consuming a piece of art is two biographies meeting: the biography of the artist that might disrupt the viewing of the art; the biography of the audience member that might shape the viewing of the art. This occurs in every case.

For me, wrestling with the question of whether you can separate the art from the artist has mainly been in the context of listening to music. Artists I’ve enjoyed, artists I’ve loved; when I read about something that they have done, hearing the music will never be the same experience again. Ryan Adams is someone whose work I had been enjoying exploring over a long period of time. His album Cold Roses contains an incredible set of songs which I had been playing a lot back in 2018. Around that time, according to Wikipedia:

…The New York Times reported that seven women (including Phoebe Bridgers and ex-wife Mandy Moore) said Adams offered to assist them with their music careers, then pursued the women romantically. They also claimed that Adams retaliated when they spurned his advances, hindering their careers and harassing them in text messages and on social media.

BBC News has a broader summary:

Several women have accused alternative rock star Ryan Adams of emotional and verbal abuse and offering career opportunities as a pretext for sex.

A report in the New York Times, external outlines a pattern of manipulative behaviour, including accusations of psychological abuse from his ex-wife, Mandy Moore.

Another woman said Adams sent explicit texts and exposed himself during a Skype call when she was a teenager.

The star, who rose to fame in the early 2000s, has denied the allegations.

I don’t think I’ve played that record since. I can’t hear the music without immediately thinking about the artist, and then about the stories surrounding him. I get annoyed that I can’t enjoy the music that I loved, but then feel guilty as I know that the pleasure that I’m denied is petty relative to the experience of the people that he has hurt and damaged.

A similar thing happened a little while later with accusations against Mark Morriss, lead singer of The Bluetones. The band’s music had been very important to me since my university days. My weeknotes tell me that I’d bought a box set of their first album in October 2021, a few months before these accusations appeared. I read the accusations with a sinking heart. Given how the scales of society are tipped, my instinct is to believe the woman’s side of the story. Morriss eventually posted a response. Who knows what actually happened? Again, I haven’t played their records since.

Despite not reaching for these albums, I find myself playing mind gymnastics with what would be ok. If I have a vinyl record and I play their music in my own house, just to myself, is that better than listening to them on Spotify where the play counts get registered and they receive a teeny bit of financial reward for my listen? Does it matter if my plays are recorded on last.fm for the world to see? What about records that they recorded at the start of their career, before the alleged offences?

Dederer’s book introduces the concept of ’the stain’, where something that someone has done at a point in their life colours to everything before and after it.

The stain begins with an act, a moment in time, but then it travels from that moment, like a tea bag steeping in water, coloring the entire life. It works its way forward and backward in time. The principle of retroactivity means that if you’ve done something sufficiently asshole-like, it follows that you were an asshole all along.

I loved the exploration of ‘the stain’ through a text message from the author’s friend:

These shortcomings of the word “monster” were clarified to me one day when I was messaging with a historian and music critic friend about the Michael Jackson problem. He wrote (in a telegraphic message-language that seemed elegant to me): i am currently trying to do the aesthetico-moral calculus thing re. MJ’s music, like, is the Jackson 5 stuff okay? oh but then in a different sense that also involved child abuse or exploitation too—michael himself. how about the ‘don’t stop til you get enough’, ‘rock with you’ era—surely he wasn’t at it then? but does the stain work its way backwards through time? I expect in practice it’ll be hard to resist the pull of the music when you hear it out and about.

Whether the stain seeps backwards and forwards in time through an artist’s work depends on the individual that is experiencing or interacting with it. Many people will hear Michael Jackson on the radio and not give it a second thought. Conversely, I’ve also been at an event where people have shouted to have his music turned off when it turned up on a playlist.

Jackson’s case fascinates me. From what I can make out, the release of the documentary film Leaving Neverland in the first week of March 2019, in which Jackson was accused of sexual abuse of two young boys, resulted many radio stations around the world removing his songs from their playlists. From Wikipedia:

Leaving Neverland led to a media backlash against Jackson. Commentators suggested Jackson’s music could fall from favor, similarly to the work of convicted child sexual abuser Gary Glitter. […] All Cogeco-owned radio stations in Canada pulled Jackson’s music from their playlists […] NH Radio in the Netherlands and MediaWorks New Zealand, New Zealand Media and Entertainment and Radio New Zealand also pulled Jackson’s music […] A 1991 episode of The Simpsons guest-starring Jackson, “Stark Raving Dad”, was pulled from circulation; the co-writer, Al Jean, said he believed Jackson had used the episode to groom boys for sexual abuse. A London concert produced by Jackson’s collaborator Quincy Jones removed Jackson’s name and album titles from its advertisements; the organizers said the modified artwork reflected the show’s inclusion of Jones’s repertoire unrelated to his work with Jackson. “Weird Al” Yankovic dropped his parodies of Jackson’s music from his Strings Attached Tour.

Lawsuits between the Jackson estate and HBO, the distributor of the documentary, followed throughout 2019 and into 2020. Putting aside whether the allegations of the film are true or not, I find it interesting that the popularity of Jackson’s work increased at the time of the film’s release. Wikipedia again:

Despite the negative publicity, Jackson’s honors were not rescinded, as had happened following sexual assault allegations made against Bill Cosby and Harvey Weinstein, and there were no mass calls to stop playing his music, as had happened following allegations against Gary Glitter and R. Kelly. Jackson’s combined music sales, including his work with the Jackson 5, increased by 10%. Streams of his music and videos increased by 6%, rising from 18.7 million between February 24 and 26 to 19.7 million between March 3 and 5. His videos were viewed 22.1 million times, an increase of roughly 1.2 million from the week prior, and three of his albums re-entered the UK iTunes chart.

Is there something about the collective perception of the quality of the work that repels the stain? Can we ‘separate the art from the artist’ if the art is good enough to warrant it?

Dederer discusses how the public perception of someone — usually male — as a ‘genius’ is sometimes sufficient for them to have their stain diminished or ignored. Some of the acts described in the book, such as Picasso stubbing out a cigarette on his partner’s face, or the details of Hemingway being “a hitter, a beater-upper, an insulter”, are shocking to read. I had never heard about them before, perhaps because the stains had been sufficiently erased by the perceived weight of their respective works.

The author then spends time examining herself. She asks whether she is a monster, even in part, mainly for working while she has children. “This is what female monstrousness looks like: abandoning the kids. Always.” I read this part of the book in my hotel room when I was on a two-week business trip, having left my wife back in the UK to run the household. The circumstance was not lost on me.

My friend was intimating something about the continuum of abandonment. There’s a spectrum. Here are some ways to be judged an abandoner of children:

Shut the home office or studio door against the child

Depend on the other parent to do the lion’s share of the childcare

Let a grandparent or a nanny or a babysitter watch the child

Put the child in day care

Go away for work for days or weeks or months at a time

Get a divorce and let the other parent have majority custody

Give the child to your parents to raise

Flee the family home

And perhaps: give the child up for adoption at birth

Add your own! The thing is, each of us can draw a line across the page at any point on this list, and say: Here. Here is where abandonment begins. Where is that line for you? Day care? Surrendering custody? Flight? Why is that the line, for you? Is it an ethical thought, or a moral feeling?

Please note that none of these behaviors count as abandonment if practiced by men. This is extra-true if the men in question are artists. As Jenny Diski so rightly points out: men do this all the time.

There is definitely truth to this. Generally, I get to go to a room and work without being disturbed. This isn’t a luxury afforded to women in equal measure.

I love the author’s writing style, which made the book a joy to read and contemplate. It’s stuck with me since I finished it and sparked some interesting conversations with friends.

Although the book focuses on artists, similar questions can be raised of monsters in other fields. If you think Elon Musk is a monster, should you never buy or use one of his products? Will you never own a Tesla or use Starlink as your Internet service provider? Perhaps the choice is more clear-cut when there is a financial transaction involved. Buying another Bluetones or Ryan Adams album feels like a bigger step than listening to records that I already own.

It was interesting to hear my two favourite information security podcasts talk about Cloudflare. In March 2019, Risky Business had an episode that was literally called Stop giving Cloudflare Money, protesting that the company was continuing to help keep an awful website live that had been used to post links to the live stream of a mass shooting in New Zealand. Fellow antipodean Troy Hunt’s weekly podcast had mentioned Cloudflare many times; he had also written extensively about how he has used their technology to optimise his services in fascinating, clever ways. From memory, Hunt made no mention of the story on his podcast. I don’t know what the right answer is — drop the Cloudflare service and do things a different way or continue to use it — but I remember at the time being fascinated by the contrast between the two podcasts.

What about the people you work with who have done something terrible in their personal lives? What about family members? Dederer asks this question and answers it:

We’ve all loved terrible people. How do I know this? Because I know people, and people are terrible.

[…]

What do we do about the terrible people in our lives? Mostly we keep loving them.

Back to the point at the start of the book — it is always two biographies meeting, in every case. How we feel about a particular person and their work isn’t just about them alone, but about us as well.

📚 The McCartney Legacy Volume 1: 1969-73

It took some weeks for me to finish this very large book. I was given this as a very thoughtful Christmas gift, but ended up buying and reading an ebook version of it as there was no way I was going to lug this around with me.

The authors started writing with the intention of creating a McCartney solo-specific version of Mark Lewisohn’s The Complete Beatles Recording Sessions, but found that they couldn’t avoid telling a story at the same time. The text of the book is punctuated by distinctive sections for each recording session, in a consistent format, informing us of what songs were worked on. They also include a little narrative to add some colour to the events:

An example recording session call-out.
An example recording session call-out.

This book was a great read. I’ve consumed so many Beatles-related books over the years, but there was still lots in here that I didn’t know. For a Beatles nut, I’m actually not that familiar with McCartney’s early solo discography. I’m a long-time fan of McCartney (1970) and Band on the Run (1973), but have only recently picked up Wild Life (1971) and am yet to explore Ram (1971) and Red Rose Speedway (1973). It’s been fun to read about a track and then listen to it on a streaming service, particularly when I wasn’t familiar with it. For the songs that I was familiar with, there were fascinating nuggets and insights. For example, I hadn’t realised that the high-pitched sound a few seconds into The Lovely Linda, the first track on Paul’s first solo album after the Beatles broke up, is the squeaking of a door that was accidentally captured and left in. This is the first example in his solo career of going with the flow when something happens:

Unlike other artists and producers inclined to erase extraneous noises or accidental instrumental strikes on individual tracks, Paul would leave them as they were recorded, allowing the potential to “explore the accident, not fix the mistake” as Seiwell put it. Though aiding the creative process, for Alan Parsons this posed a problem. “You try to keep the tracks clean and try to avoid having to pull down faders every time if there is a noise or a talking voice or something,” he explained. “Whereas McCartney was notorious for never allowing engineers to wipe anything, so it always made the mix take twice as long.”

It was amazing to hear that Henry McCullough got to appear on Pink Floyd’s Dark Side of the Moon through the accident of Wings being booked in a neighbouring studio:

“They were next door making Dark Side of the Moon,” said Paul. “The engineers were quite interchangeable, so an engineer that’d work on their stuff would work on ours. And he did play us some of the Dark Side of the Moon stuff.” For an hour or so, during the weekend of January 19 and 20, Wings and Pink Floyd joined forces, on Pink Floyd’s turf, when the latter were recording voices that would be woven into the fabric of several songs.

And so it was that a hazy recollection of McCullough’s—“I don’t know, I was really drunk at the time!”—found its way into ‘Us and Them,’ a track on one of the most revered albums in the history of rock.

Despite its size, the book didn’t feel overly-long or too detailed. I found myself picking it up at any available moment and was disappointed when I reached the end. Fortunately there’s a sequel in the works that is due out in December this year, covering the period 1974–1980. Here’s how we leave things:

With a critically lauded, Gold-certified hit album on his hands, Paul found himself in a very different position at the end of 1973 than he’d been in at the end of 1969. Four years earlier, he was crawling from the wreckage of the Beatles, unsure of himself and his future. But he had also been nursed, coaxed, and sweet-talked by Linda into recognizing his strengths sufficiently to borrow a Studer four-track from EMI and set down some tunes, taking his first steps toward reinventing himself. But what he recorded then was a motley batch, assembled largely of belatedly finished songs from the Beatle days, revived and polished juvenilia from the late 1950s, and jams molded into instrumentals. He started with only two new songs; others had sprouted as he worked, including the enduring ‘Maybe I’m Amazed.’ But the music on Band on the Run was fresh—its oldest songs were written during the Red Rose Speedway sessions—and the album was fully conceived before the first session.

I’m excited to find out what the next book brings.

📚 How Civil Wars Start

Finished reading How Civil Wars Start by Barbara F. Walter. I picked this up from Heather Burns’ 2023 ‘get ready for the coming US election’ reading list. The title is perfect, as the book is literally a narrative that explains the research into the conditions that can typically lead to civil war. It’s been interesting to read this in such close proximity to the riots in the UK that have been taking place over the past week.

A central point of the book is that countries that are neither full democracies nor full autocracies as defined by the ‘polity score’ — known as ‘anocracies’ — are the most likely to experience instability and/or armed conflict. There is danger as a country moves through the anocracy zone, whether that is a country that has declined from being a full democracy, or a country that is moving at speed towards full democracy.

From the Center for Systemic Peace’s Polity Project

The USA slipped from a rating of 10 in 2015 to a rating of 5 in 2020, following the insurrection on 6 January that year. It became an anocracy for the first time in over two centuries.

Once a country is in the anocracy zone, the biggest warning sign of a civil war is the appearance of a faction, a political group based on ethnic, religious or racial identity rather than ideology. Civil war is even more likely in countries divided into two dominant groups, where one group represents 40–60% of the population. The group that once held power and feels it slipping away is likely to be the one that starts the violence.

People may tolerate years of poverty, unemployment, and discrimination. They may accept shoddy schools, poor hospitals, and neglected infrastructure. But there is one thing they will not tolerate: losing status in a place they believe is theirs. In the twenty-first century, the most dangerous factions are once-dominant groups facing decline.

In recent years, social media has accelerated this process. The proportion of Americans getting some of their news from social media has increased from 23% in 2013 to over 70% today. The platforms promote “a sense of perpetual crisis”. The riots in the UK over this past week are fresh in my mind as I re-read this:

Disinformation spread by extremists discredits peaceful protesters, convinces citizens that counterattacks by opposition groups are likely, and creates a sense—often a false sense—that moderates within their own movement are not doing enough to protect the population, or are ineffective and weak compared to the opposition. It’s at this point that violence breaks out: when citizens become convinced that there is no hope of fixing their problems through conventional means.

I’m not sure that this is exactly what is happening right now in the UK — so far the riots don’t seem to have spread to moderate people — but I can see how it might happen.

Walter weaves the ten stages of genocide into her narrative. According to Wikipedia, stage 4 is ‘dehumanisation’, where “One group denies the humanity of the other group. Members of it are equated with animals, vermin, insects, or diseases.” The ongoing narrative about refugees and asylum seekers in the UK’s most popular newspapers promotes this way of thinking, and has been so painful to see.

“THE ‘SWARM’ ON OUR STREETS” is a disgusting headline. The Daily Mail has been pushing this agenda for as long as I can remember. It may be impossible to draw a direct line between these front pages and the riots that have been happening in the UK over the past week, but they can’t help.

The author also mentions Varieties of Democracy (V-Dem), an organisation that publishes fascinating reports and datasets on how countries around the world are democratising or autocratizing. The recent reports are jarring.

V-Dem, the Swedish research institute, collects detailed data on the different types of democracies around the world and then rates them on a 100-point scale with 100 being the most democratic and 0 being the least. According to the institute, Spain has suffered one of the worst declines in Western Europe, followed by Greece, Germany, France, the United Kingdom, Ireland, and Austria. Nordic countries, the most liberal in the world, have also dropped since 2010: Denmark, the number one ranked democracy for most of the past hundred years, has been downgraded 10 points on V-Dem’s scale; Sweden has been downgraded 35. The swift rate of democratic decay around the world has been so rapid that V-Dem issued its first “Autocratization Alert” in 2020.

The book explains that the most effective way for a country to avoid violence and civil war is to strengthen the quality of its governance, and make people feel that the systems and institutions are working. People need to value their democracy and believe that it is effective. Doing this is “significantly more important” to avoid conflict than improving the economy.

“…three features stood out: “the rule of law” (the equal and impartial application of legal procedure); “voice and accountability” (the extent to which citizens are able to participate in selecting their government, as well as freedom of expression, freedom of association, and a free media); and “government effectiveness” (the quality of public services and the quality and independence of the civil service). These three features reflect the degree to which a government serves its people and the degree to which its political institutions are strong, legitimate, and accountable. Improvements in governance tend to reduce the subsequent risk of war.”

The book is a quick read on a tough subject, giving an excellent overview of the resources and evidence available.

📚 Mapping the Roads: Building modern Britain

I’ve finished reading Mapping The Roads: Building modern Britain by Mike Parker. A beautiful little book that had been on my shelf for years. It’s filled with gems, such as:

  • Driving on the left became law in 1722 in an effort to deal with congestion on London Bridge. (Driving on the left makes sense as tradition for horse riders in a world where most people are right-handed; that hand is free for greetings or drawing swords.)
  • In 1895, Britain had around 15 cars. This swelled to 700–800 by the turn of the century, 8,500 by 1904 and more than 85,000 ten years later.
  • Bridget Driscoll was the first pedestrian to be killed by a car in Britain, in 1896. The coroner said he hoped that “such a thing would never happen again”.
  • The AA had people on patrol who would salute members showing their badges. If the AA patrol person didn’t salute, you could stop and ask them why and they could then inform you of a speed trap ahead.
  • Fuel cost the equivalent of £2/litre (in 2016 prices) in 1920.
  • The road numbering system in England and Wales is focused on London, with the M1 going directly north and the numbers ascending in order in a clockwise direction. Scotland got roads beginning with 7, 8 and 9, centred around Edinburgh. In both cases the most important roads got the shortest numbers.
  • The first petrol station opened in 1919. Ten years later there were 54,000.
  • The first motorway in Britain was…the Preston bypass, not the M1.

The book has so many lovely maps and illustrations. Pitched at just the right level for a road-curious nerd without getting lost in the detail, it was a joy to read.

📚 More than a Glitch

I’ve finished reading More than a Glitch: Confronting Race, Gender, and Ability Bias in Tech by Meredith Broussard.

Quote from the book ‘More than a Glitch’ by Meredith Broussard: “ Tech is racist and sexist and ableist because the world is so. Computers just reflect the existing reality and suggest that things will stay the same-they predict the status quo. By adopting a more critical view of technology, and by being choosier about the tech we allow into our lives and our society, we can employ technology to stop reproducing the world as it is, and get us closer to a world that is truly more just.”

The book is a polemic that explores technology, algorithms, machine learning and artificial intelligence and asserts that they are always biased. It has really got me thinking and seeing things in a different way. It reminded me of when I read Ibram X. Kendi’s How To Be An Antiracist in that it has given me a completely new way of seeing the world. Recently I have been reviewing documents on ethical AI and I am now looking at them in a completely different light.

This coded language shows up everywhere once you are attuned to it. Consider this IBM AI governance report, which reads: “Extensive evidence has shown that AI can embed human and societal biases and deploy them at scale. Many experts are now saying that unwanted bias might be the major barrier that prevents Al from reaching its full potential. . . . So how do we ensure that automated decisions are less biased than human decision-making?” This is problematic because it assumes that Al’s “full potential” is even possible, which has no evidence aside from the imagination of a small, homogenous group of people who have been consistently wrong about predicting the future and who have not sufficiently factored in structural inequality. The question of “How do we ensure that automated decisions are less biased?” reinforces this problematic assumption, implicitly asserting for the reader that computational decisions are less biased. This is not true, and IBM and other firms should stop writing things that include this assumption. The technochauvinist binary thinking of either computers or humans is the problem: neither alone will deliver us.

I loved the insights on how inputs into machine learning models come from a world that is inherently biased, which will always lead to tools that are biased in some way. Many examples are given of how the systems that have been trained on this data enforce and amplify the existing patterns. For example, where exams couldn’t take place in 2020 due to the COVID-19 pandemic, algorithms were used to determine pupil grades instead. The book gives examples from the US, but I distinctly remember the fiasco here in the UK. Assigning grades to students based on historic data from their school, or through the use of any other other demographic information, may seem ‘fair’ to those people designing the algorithm. But to any one person being judged by the system it is deeply unfair.

The book explores the use of machine learning systems by the police. Historic data shows where arrests have been made and who was arrested, but not necessarily where crimes have been committed and who did them. This bias creates a feedback loop where predictive technology asserts that future crimes will be committed in similar areas, by similar people.

The thing is, everyone is a criminal to some extent because everyone has done things that violate the law. For example, white and Black people use drugs and deal drugs at equal rates. Bias determines who gets constructed as a criminal; not everyone gets caught, not everyone gets punished, and some people get punished more than others. The unequal application of justice can be seen in crime maps. Look at a crime map for any major city, and it’s pretty much the same as the map of where Black people live. Again, not because Black people commit more crimes, but because the things we call “crime maps” are actually arrest maps, and Black people are arrested for crimes at a higher rate. When you train algorithms on crime data, you are training the algorithm to over-police certain zip codes or geographic areas, because that is what has happened in real life in the past. You are training the algorithms to be biased.

There’s a fantastic example where someone has put together a ‘White Collar Crime Risk Zones’ tool which identifies ‘hotspots’ in a similar way to other systems. For New York City you can see that the major ’risk areas’ are clustered around the financial districts.

Screenshot from the website ‘White Collar Crime Risk Zones’. A map of New York City is shown, zoomed in to show parts of Manhattan, Brooklyn and Queens. Yellow and red ‘clouds’ are on the map to show zones of white-collar crime risk, clustered around the Financial District and Midtown Manhattan. Brooklyn and Queens have almost no yellow or red blobs.

Broussard asserts that people coming from the data science/technology world often assume that they can use their tools to get insights in whatever field they are applying them to, without considering the long history, large body of work and experts that have been in this space for many years before them:

One of the big misconceptions of data science is that it provides insights. It doesn’t always. Sometimes the insights are merely things that the data scientists didn’t know, but people in other disciplines already knew. There’s an important distinction between what is unknown to the world versus what is simply unknown to you. Data scientists in general need to do more qualitative research, and talk to experts in relevant fields, before designing and implementing quantitative systems.

I loved the insight that designing tools for inclusion actually makes them better for everybody. It got me thinking about the minimal effort that I have been putting in to adding alt-text to images on this website. The tools I use for blogging don’t help me but I know there will be a way to do it. I’ll try harder. It’s not really acceptable that images are inaccessible to vision-impaired readers in 2024.

Useful innovations like the typewriter, text messaging, audiobooks, remote controls, wide rubber grips on kitchen tools, voice assistants, and closed captioning all stem from designs for disability. “When we design for disability first, we often stumble upon solutions that are not only inclusive, but also are often better than when we design for the norm,” Roy said. “This excites me, because this means that the energy it takes to accommodate someone with a disability can be leveraged, molded, and played with as a force for creativity and innovation. This moves us from the mindset of trying to change the hearts and the deficiency mindset of tolerance to becoming an alchemist, the type of magician that this world so desperately needs to solve some of its greatest problems.”

Although I found the writing style quite dry, I’m very glad I picked this book up. I’m going to be thinking about its insights long after I’ve put it down.

📚 The Intelligence Illusion

Finished reading The Intelligence Illusion by Baldur Bjarnason, as recommended to me by Chris Verbree on micro.blog. This short book has a specific focus on the use of Generative AI in business and the myriad of problems and risks that may result. It took no more than a couple of hours to read, but following up with the footnotes and references will keep me going for weeks.

In short, the broader the use case and more general the AI deployment, the riskier the outcomes are likely to be. Using a large language model to summarise or convert content is a good use case. Offering an AI-powered general purpose chatbot to your customers is likely to cause a plethora of problems, particularly where you are not able to vet the data that the model has been trained on. Businesses need to make sure that they aren’t getting themselves into sticky situations by moving too quickly or deploying technology that can break in unexpected ways. Governments and regulation moves slowly, but at some point it will catch up and there may be a lot of companies exposed to lawsuits and fines when it does.

This book is required reading for everyone involved in looking at Generative AI for their business or in their work.

📚 New Dark Age: Technology and the End of the Future

For some reason my rate of reading has been very slow this year. This may explain the feeling I had when I finished New Dark Age: Technology and the End of the Future by James Bridle — that it hadn’t made a big impression on me. Looking back over the 150 highlights I made as I read the book, I think I am mistaken. Bridle covers a lot of ground, and I can see in the highlights the origins of ideas that have been buzzing around in my head over the past couple of months.

The fascinating premise of the book is that that the more technology seeps further into our world, the less we understand about it — we enter a collective ‘dark age’ of understanding. This is a paradox given that we now have greater access to knowledge than at any time in the past. It made me think of something else I read or heard — perhaps from Alain de Botton — that modern knowledge work is now largely invisible. You can stand in the middle of an office full of people and not be able to simply see or understand what everyone is doing. This wasn’t true back in the days when computers were human. Scaling this notion up from the level of a single office to our whole society, the premise still holds true.

It was fascinating to read about the SSEC, a working computer that went on show in the window of premises opposite IBM’s headquarters in Manhattan. It’s a perfect metaphor for us not being able to see what the technology is doing:

[…]the IBM Selective Sequence Electronic Calculator (SSEC), installed in New York in 1948, refused such easy reading. It was called a calculator because in 1948 computers were still people, and the president of IBM, Thomas J. Watson, wanted to reassure the public that his products were not designed to replace them. […] The SSEC was installed in full view of the public inside a former ladies’ shoe shop next to IBM’s offices on East Fifty-Seventh Street, behind thick plate glass. […] To the crowds pressed up against the glass, even with the columns in place, the SSEC radiated a sleek, modern appearance. It took its aesthetic cues from the Harvard Mark I, which was designed by Norman Bel Geddes, the architect of the celebrated Futurama exhibit at the 1939 New York World’s Fair. It was housed in the first computer room to utilise a raised floor, now standard in data centres, to hide unsightly cabling from its audience […] after the first couple of weeks, the machine was largely taken up by top secret calculations for a programme called Hippo, devised by John von Neumann’s team at Los Alamos to simulate the first hydrogen bomb. Programming Hippo took almost a year, and when it was ready it was run continuously on the SSEC, twenty-four hours a day, seven days a week, for several months. The result of the calculations was at least three full simulations of a hydrogen bomb explosion: calculations carried out in full view of the public, in a shopfront in New York City, without anyone on the street being even slightly aware of what was going on.

Bridle asserts that we have mistaken the collection of masses of data for increased information and knowledge, but this is misplaced. The more data we have, the harder it is to make sense of it:

And so we find ourselves today connected to vast repositories of knowledge, and yet we have not learned to think. In fact, the opposite is true: that which was intended to enlighten the world in practice darkens it. The abundance of information and the plurality of worldviews now accessible to us through the internet are not producing a coherent consensus reality, but one riven by fundamentalist insistence on simplistic narratives, conspiracy theories, and post-factual politics. It is on this contradiction that the idea of a new dark age turns: an age in which the value we have placed upon knowledge is destroyed by the abundance of that profitable commodity, and in which we look about ourselves in search of new ways to understand the world.

With the rapid deployment of large language models and other types of artificial intelligence, this issue is probably going to get worse. People are working on trying to understand why generative AI works as it does; as I learned recently, the history of AI contains a substantial amount of trial and error.

It was also shocking to me to read that the mass surveillance that came to light through the Edward Snowden revelations a decade ago have been collectively shrugged off and continue to this day:

Ultimately, the public appetite for confronting the insane, insatiable demands of the intelligence agencies was never there and, having briefly surfaced in 2013, has fallen off, wearied by the drip-drip of revelation and the sheer existential horror of it all. We never really wanted to know what was in those secret rooms, those windowless buildings in the centre of the city, because the answer was always going to be bad. Much like climate change, mass surveillance has proved to be too vast and destabilising an idea for society to really get its head around.

And this is despite there being evidence that this kind of mass surveillance doesn’t work very well:

Studies have repeatedly shown that mass surveillance generates little to no useful information for counterterrorism offices. In 2013, the President’s Review Group on Intelligence and Communications Technologies declared mass surveillance ‘not essential to preventing attacks’, finding that most leads were generated by traditional investigative techniques such as informants and reports of suspicious activities.

I think that people don’t understand, or don’t care, enough about surveillance. When I tell people that I have Siri turned off on my Apple devices, that I won’t have an Amazon Alexa or Google Home ‘smart speaker’ in my house, and wouldn’t install a Ring doorbell, I sound like a tin-foil hat-wearing crazy person. But I’m really not keen on everything I’m saying being recorded, stored on some random servers somewhere and available to engineers that work at the company that owns them.

I’ve also been thinking about how our 1990s-era visions of the Internet being a democratising, distributed force have not played out like that at all. The tendency of both IT services and infrastructure has been to move towards monopolies and oligopolies. And when regulations arrive, the incumbents are the beneficiaries; they are able to respond to the regulations and implement any required changes with their deep pockets. Conversely, the price of entry for new companies may then be too high. The rising tide of the proliferation of technology into everything doesn’t lift all boats equally.

Technology is in fact a key driver of inequality across many sectors. The relentless progress of automation–from supermarket checkouts to trading algorithms, factory robots to self-driving cars–increasingly threatens human employment across the board. There is no safety net for those whose skills are rendered obsolete by machines; and even those who programme the machines are not immune. As the capabilities of machines increase, more and more professions are under attack, with artificial intelligence augmenting the process. The internet itself helps shape this path to inequality, as network effects and the global availability of services produces a winner-takes-all marketplace, from social networks and search engines to grocery stores and taxi companies. The complaint of the Right against communism–that we’d all have to buy our goods from a single state supplier–has been supplanted by the necessity of buying everything from Amazon. And one of the keys to this augmented inequality is the opacity of technological systems themselves.

It’s a fascinating read. I was already some way through the book before realising that there is an updated edition available. I haven’t been able to find out what has changed with this new version, but I am sure it will only have enhanced what is already a very good book.

My friction-filled information workflow

Every 18 months or so I find myself feeling that my personal information workflow is working against me. Sometimes I end up diving into an inevitably fruitless quest to find an application that could be ‘the answer to everything’.

Last year I thought that some of the friction might have been coming from where I am able to access each application that I use. In my personal life I have an iPhone, an iPad and a MacBook, but at work I use a Windows laptop. I always prefer web applications as they can, in theory, be accessed from anywhere. However, it’s difficult to find web apps that have all of the features that I want.

My whiteboard from December 2021 trying to work all of this out.

My whiteboard from December 2021 trying to work all of this out.

Mapping out each of the applications was useful; it made me realise that I could move my old documents and notes archive in Evernote over to OneNote, saving money on a subscription. After wrestling with the migration over a few days, that was that. Things got busy and I didn’t look at my personal workflow again. Until now.

After getting ‘the itch’ again, this time I’ve tried to map out exactly what my current personal workflow looks like, regardless of where the applications are accessible. Here is the resulting mess:

My workflow, such as it is, today.

My workflow, such as it is, today. (Click to enlarge.)

I haven’t decided where to go from here. What I do know is that I need to ponder this for a bit before making any changes. Experience tells me that the problems I have (or feel that I have) are less about the applications and more about the purposeful habits that I need to form.

Some disorganised thoughts:

  • There is still definitely an issue with where I can access each of the components from. Every time I need to switch devices, there is friction.
  • Finding apps that are super secure — i.e. those that encrypt data locally before being sent to the application’s cloud storage — do exist, but at the moment they feel like using a cheese grater to shave your legs. Yes, I could use Standard Notes everywhere, but the friction of working with it is much higher than being forced onto my Apple devices to use Ulysses.
  • Some of the apps are replacements for each other in theory, but not in practice.
    • Readwise Reader can keep YouTube videos I want to watch later, but they then become slightly less accessible if I am sitting down to watch them in front of a TV.
    • Readwise Reader can also accept RSS feeds, but at the moment the implementation is nowhere near as good as Feedbin. I tried it through exporting my OPML file of feed subscriptions and importing it into Reader, but when it wasn’t working for me I found I had to painstakingly back out my RSS subscriptions one by one.
  • I’m still searching for a good way to curate my reading backlog. I estimate that I have over 1,000 ebooks1, hundreds of physical books, hundreds of PDFs and nearly 9,000 articles saved to my ‘read later’ app. I’ve already done the maths to work out that even if I live to a ripe old age, there is not enough time left to get through all of the books that I’ve bought. As Ben Thompson has been saying: in an age of abundance, the most precious and valuable thing becomes attention. I have lists of all my books in Dynalist, but still rely on serendipity when it’s time to pick up another one to read.
  • I need to work out the best way to distinguish between the things I have to do versus the things I want to do. Not that these are absolutes; the amount of things that I absolutely, positively have to do is probably minimal. I might save a YouTube video that would be super helpful for my job right now, and want to prioritise this above others that I have saved for broader learning or entertainment. What’s the easiest way to distinguish them and be purposeful about what I pick up next?
  • Similarly, where should a list of ‘check out concept x’ tasks go? These aren’t really ‘tasks’. When is the right time to pick one of these up?
  • I’m finding that using Kanban for projects is much easier than long lists of tasks in a to-do app. At work we use Planview AgilePlace (formerly known as LeanKit) which from what I can tell is the most incredible Kaban tool out there; if you can imagine the swimlanes, you can probably draw them in AgilePlace. But it’s difficult to justify the cost of $20/month for a personal licence. I’m using Trello for now.
  • Needing to look at different apps to decide what to do next is a problem. But how much worse is it than using one app and changing focus between project views and task views?
  • Are date-based reminders (put the bins out, clean the dishwasher, replace the cycle helmet, stain the garden fence) a different class of tasks altogether? Are they the only things that should be put in a classic ‘to do’ tool?
  • One of the main sticking points of my current workflow is items hanging around for too long in my capture tools (Drafts and Dynalist) when they should be moved off somewhere else. Taking the time to regularly review any of these lists is also a key practice. Sometimes I haven’t decided what I want to do with a thing so it doesn’t move on anywhere, which is also a problem. I need to get more decisive the first time I capture a thing.
  • Document storage is a lost art. After I drew the diagram above, I’ve consolidated all of my cloud documents onto one platform — OneDrive — but now need to go through and file what’s there.

I know that there are no right answers. However, now that I can see it all, hopefully I can start to work out some purposeful, meaningful changes to how I manage all of this stuff. I’m going to make sure that I measure twice, cut once.


  1. The consequence of slowly building up a library as Kindle books were discounted. Aside from checking the Kindle Daily Deal page, I’ve largely stopped now. Looking back, I don’t think this was a great strategy. It seems much better to be mindful about making a few well-intentioned purchases, deliberately paying full price for books from authors I like. 

📚 Book summaries — with and without AI

This is an excellent blog post on working with ChatGPT to generate insightful book summaries. It’s long, but it covers a lot of ground in terms of what the technology does well and what it struggles with right now. Jumping to the conclusion, it seems that you get much better results if you feed the tool with your own notes first; it isn’t immediately obvious that the model doesn’t have access to (or hasn’t been trained on) the contents of a particular book.

When I finish a book that I’ve enjoyed, I like to write a blog post about it. It’s this process of writing which properly embeds the book into my memory. It also gives me something that I can refer back to, which I often do. As I read, I make copious highlights — and occasionally, notes — which all go into Readwise. If the book has captured my imagination, I start writing by browsing through these highlights. Any that seem particularly important, or make or support a point that I want to make somewhere in the write-up, get copied into a draft blog post. From there I try to work out what I’m really thinking. I love this process. It takes a lot of effort, but the end result can be super satisfying.

The summary that I’ve shared most often is A Seat at The Table by Mark Schwartz, which seems to pop up in conversations at work all the time. Going back to my own blog post is a great way to refresh my memory on the key points and to continue whatever conversation I happen to be in.

My favourite write-up is Hitman by Bret Hart. I picked the book up this time last year as a holiday read. I had no idea it would have such a big impact on me, bringing back lots of childhood memories and getting me thinking about the strange ways in which the rise of the Internet has changed our world. Getting my thoughts in order after I put the book down was incredibly satisfying.

Using ChatGPT or another Large Language Model to generate a book summary for me defeats the point. The process of crafting a narrative, in my head and then on a digital page, is arguably more valuable than the output. Getting a tool to do this for me could be a shortcut to a write-up, but at the expense of me learning and growing from what I’ve read.

📚 John Steinbeck on the value of fiction

From America and Americans:

Not long ago, after my last trip to Russia, I had a conversation with an American very eminent in the field of politics. I asked him what he read, and he replied that he studied history, sociology, economics, and law.

“How about fiction-novels, plays, poetry?” I asked.

“No,” he said, “I have never had time for them. There is so much else I have to read.”

I said, “Sir, I have recently visited Russia for the third time. I don’t know how well I understand Russians; but I do know that if I had only read Russian history I could not have had the access to Russian thinking I have had from reading Dostoevsky, Tolstoy, Chekhov, Pushkin, Turgenev, Sholokhov, and Ehrenburg. History only recounts, with some inaccuracy, what they did. The fiction tells, or tries to tell, why they did it and what they felt and were like when they did it.”

My friend nodded gravely. “I hadn’t thought of that,” he said. “Yes, that might be so; I had always thought of fiction as opposed to fact.”

But in considering the American past, how poor we would be in information without Huckleberry Finn, An American Tragedy, Winesburg, Ohio, Main Street, The Great Gatsby, and As I Lay Dying. And if you want to know about Pennsylvania of the last hundred years, you’ll read O’Hara or you’ll know less than you might.”

📚 Everything You Need to Know About the Menopause

There are some things that happen in life that people don’t talk about, despite the commonality of the experience. Recently, a group of my online friends started discussing their, and their partners’, experience of the menopause. One person shared with the group, and all of a sudden the stories came pouring out. I knew the basics, but I didn’t realise how much of a difficult — and sometimes devastating — experience it could be.

My wife and I are both 45 so it felt like a good time to learn a lot more about it. Kate Muir’s book, Everything You Need to Know About the Menopause (but were too afraid to ask) is an excellent place to start.

The key points I took from the book were:

  • Dealing with the effects of the menopause over a long period of time is a relatively recent phenomenon. In the Victorian era in the UK, people used to die at the average age of 59. With average life expectancy now extended by thirty years, women have to live in a post-menopausal state for much longer.
  • There is nowhere near enough education about the menopause. We learn about puberty at school but not about what happens to half of the population in later life. Given how reluctant people are to talk about it, access to information can be difficult.

The divide between those who have menopause support and knowledge and those left to suffer is massive.

  • More worryingly, the lack of education also extends to the medical profession. The book contains horrific stories of undiagnosed and misdiagnosed patients, including the case of one woman ultimately being given electroshock therapy after being diagnosed with ‘treatment-resistant depression’. It turned out that her symptoms were caused by hormone deficiency:

Although the menopause will happen to every woman in the world, and has massive health consequences, according to a Menopause Support investigation, 41 per cent of UK medical schools do not give mandatory menopause education.

… in one study of around 3,000 British menopausal women, after complaining of the onset of low mood or anxiety, 66 per cent were offered antidepressants by their doctor instead of hormones.

  • Some good news is that there is freely-accessible information out there for medical professionals, for example this 90-minute video from Dr Louise Newson on assessing perimenopausal and menopausal women, and safely prescribing HRT during remote consultations:

  • Menopause leads to other major health issues — osteoporosis (brittle and fragile bones), Alzheimer’s (dementia) and heart disease. There are some things you can do to combat a reduction in bone density, such as high-impact exercise, but on their own they are not as effective as when they are combined with Hormone Replacement Therapy (HRT). Using body-identical transdermal estrogen after the age of 50 halves a woman’s chances of breaking a hip and reduces her chances of having a heart attack.
  • A Women’s Health Initiative study in 2002 made people extremely wary of HRT. It turns out that there are different types of treatment; compounded ‘bioidentical’ tablets are awful as there is no reliable way to know what they contain, whereas body-identical hormone cream does not carry the same risks:

We need to question the conventional wisdom, which says that HRT causes breast cancer and that the risks of taking HRT outweigh the benefits. What most people – including me, until I began my investigation – think they know about HRT is wrong on two counts: every form of HRT is not the same, and the terrifying cancer-scare headlines which erupted with the Women’s Health Initiative Study back in 2002 refer to the older, synthetic forms of HRT that have now been superseded by a completely different products.

The bad news: In the general population, 23 cases of breast cancer will be diagnosed per 1,000 women. If women take the old, synthetic HRT, an additional 4 cases appear. If women drink a large glass of wine every day, an additional 5 cases appear. If women are obese (BMI over 30), an additional 24 cases appear. The good news: If women take 2.5 hours of moderate exercise per week, 7 cases disappear. If women take estrogen-only HRT, 4 cases disappear.

  • The experience of the menopause is yet another burden for women that can hold them back in their careers. It typically turns up at a time when they already have a lot on their plates, trying to sustain a career whilst dealing with moody teenagers and ageing parents. Hot flushes can be debilitating. Thanks to reports on COVID-19 we have heard a lot about ‘brain fog’; unfortunately this is another symptom of the menopause:

When scientists ask menopausal women about their symptoms, 80 per cent report hot flushes, 77 per cent report joint pain, and 60 per cent memory issues. Aside from these three, further plagues of the menopause include: heart palpitations, sleeplessness, anxiety, depression, headaches, panic attacks, exhaustion, irritability, muscle pain, night sweats, loss of libido, vaginal dryness, body odour, brittle nails, dry mouth, digestive problems, gum disease, dry skin, hair loss, poor concentration, weight gain, dizzy spells, stress incontinence – and last but not least, something that might be from a horror movie: formication, which means an itchy feeling under the skin, like ants. I had that. Quite simply, the majority of women battle through the menopause, and only a lucky few are symptom-free.

  • Suicide is at its highest for women aged 45–49, and at its second highest in the 50–54 age group.
  • Some women have to deal with menopause much earlier in their lives than they would otherwise expect. Early onset menopause, and medical menopause (i.e. following a medical procedure), can both be extremely traumatic. One in 40 women experience the menopause before they turn 40.
  • Women actually produce more testosterone than estrogen. According to menopause experts, testosterone is an essential hormone that should be replaced and yet it is not officially prescribed ‘on licence’ on the UK National Health Service as part of HRT. It shouldn’t be considered a ‘lifestyle drug’ just used to enhance a person’s libido, but “a life-saving hormone that will preserve [women’s] brains, bodies and long-term health.” It enhances “cognition, muscle, mode, bone density and energy.”
  • There is a ‘window of opportunity’ at the start of the menopause to begin estrogen replacement which reduces the chances of dementia and Alzheimer’s.
  • However, promising research is growing on older women starting HRT a decade or more after the menopause.
  • There is a small group of oncologists are looking at prescribing HRT to breast cancer survivors following a good recovery, used in conjunction with anti-cancer drugs such as tamoxifen. It may be that in some cases, the quality of a person’s life post-menopause outweighs the risks.

The book is a must-read. It has increased my knowledge from next-to-nothing to a broad, general understanding of something that half of the people around me will go through at some point in their lives. I’ve bought a second copy to be left in our book-swap rack at my office.

📚 Re-educated

I’ve just finished reading Lucy Kellaway’s excellent book on how she went through fundamental life changes in her late 50s, leaving her decades-long job at the Financial Times to become a secondary school teacher as well as separating from her husband, moving house and embracing grey hair.

The chapters of the book give different slices through the author’s life and experiences, kept fresh through the angles that they take. In one chapter late in the book we are given what I assume to be a ‘typical’ day in her life as a teacher, from when she wakes up until she’s back in bed again.

The book is life-affirming and relatable, with a few nuggets of wisdom in its pages:

Most of them are getting the questions right. I used to think that asking kids things they already knew was pointless. But it’s not: it puts them in a good mood for learning new things.

Kellaway reflects on her own past: her parents and her education, as well as the way in which she brought up her own children. I found myself nodding in recognition to her experiences both as a parent:

Subsequently I discovered that size of house cuts both ways. It may have kept us safe from the world outside, but it also kept us safe from each other. As the children grew older and became teenagers an average evening at number 52 would not find the family amiably playing Scrabble or even gathering passively around the TV to watch Friends. After a quick supper cooked by me – soggy leek-and-bacon pasta or chicken nuggets and broccoli – we dispersed.

…and as someone who wants to focus on specialising and refining their performance in their current job, not focusing on promotion:

My position, and that of about two-thirds of the Now Teachers, is quite different. We have no desire to advance above the bottom rung of the ladder that we are now squarely standing on. We own our own property and don’t need to prove ourselves in the same way she does. We don’t want to be promoted, but only want to be responsible for our own classes and for becoming better at what we do. That feels quite enough. This resistance to promotion makes us both happier and harder to manage.

But the best parts are about her experiences as a teacher, and what she has come to learn — and to question — over the past few years:

For all its strictness, the school does give some latitude to teachers on how they teach. Yet this is provisional, and puts the onus on me. I need to prove that I can get good results – and I have absolutely no idea if I can. Is it possible to teach both the world and the syllabus? If not, is there a trade-off? If children get one grade lower because they have spent a lot of time thinking about broader things, how much does it matter?

I enjoy planning lessons but it strikes me as a shocking waste of time. Why aren’t there national lesson plans designed by the best teachers in the country and updated every year? I spend the next 20 minutes hastily scrabbling around for material and putting together a slap-dash PowerPoint.

Two years later, I have a clearer idea of what it is I’m trying to do. Changing lives turns out not to be about making instant transformations – it is about hard slog and tiny, incremental improvements. This realisation has changed my own life – or at least how I teach, and the sort of teacher I want to be.

Since that day the penny has dropped: the best way of helping Alicia is not to try to make economics a fun show, it is to get her to pass her exam. If it is a teacher’s job to open doors, those doors, under the present regime, are GCSEs. When I started teaching, I thought exams were a necessary evil. I still think that. I hate the way schools talk of them as if they are the purpose of education, when in fact they are merely (flawed) evidence that you’ve acquired some. I despised the government’s response to Covid in schools, where it prioritised the year groups taking exams, as if the education of the other years somehow didn’t matter. I despair at the way teachers spend as much time teaching exam technique as the subject itself. Yet despite this I, too, am teaching the exam first and economics second.

Recommended.

📚 Hitman

To me there is something beautiful about a brotherhood of big, tough men who only pretend to hurt one another for a living instead of actually doing it. I came to appreciate that there is an art to it. In contrast to my father, who loved to proudly tell people who the real tough guys, or shooters, of his generation were, I can just as proudly tell you who the great workers, or pretenders, of my generation were. — Bret Hart

Satellite TV entered my house when I was eleven. At first, I was mainly obsessed with MTV’s never-ending carousel of music videos. That was until my dad spotted a small advert in the TV section of the newspaper, letting us know that something called WrestleMania V was showing on Sky TV that evening. The incredibly-named ‘Macho Man’ Randy Savage was to face off against the blonde-moustached Hulk Hogan. My brothers and I tuned in to watch, and our heads promptly exploded.

Looking back now, we weren’t obsessively into Wrestling for that long. After WrestleMania V we kept up with the storylines for a while, but I don’t remember too much after The Ultimate Warrior beat Hulk Hogan to win the top belt at WrestleMania VI. But in the short period that it grabbed us, we watched it all the time. Quickly, the World Wrestling Federation made us familiar with characters that ranged from the sublime to the ridiculous: ‘Rowdy’ Roddy Piper, Brutus ‘The Barber’ Beefcake, Mr Perfect, ‘Ravishing’ Rick Rude, André The Giant, ‘Superfly’ Jimmy Snuka, ‘The Million Dollar Man’ Ted DiBiase, Bad News Brown, Dusty Rhodes, The Big Boss Man, ‘Hacksaw’ Jim Duggan, Jake ‘The Snake’ Roberts, ‘The British Bulldog’ Davey Boy Smith and The Honky Tonk Man, along with the tag teams of The Hart Foundation, The Bushwhackers, Demolition and the Legion of Doom. We even got to know the brilliant commentators: Gorilla Monsoon, Jesse ‘The Body’ Ventura, Bobby Heenan and Vince McMahon.

Mum and dad used to get mad at us kids for play-wrestling all of the time. After the shows had finished we’d become the wrestlers, jumping off the sofa and getting each other into holds. Typically to Gorilla Moonsoon-like cries of “Look out!”, “He’s put him in a half nelson!” and “Right in the breadbasket!” Often the wrestling would escalate to the point of an accident, tears or both. I once cracked my brother’s head open on the corner of a the stereo cabinet in the lounge. Children are different these days, probably much nicer to each other as they are typically in front of screens instead of making up their own games. I’m not sure which is better.

I didn’t think about wrestling for a long time. A few years ago I found myself walking to the train station, listening to the Reconcilable Differences podcast and hearing Merlin Mann raving about a 1990s ‘Hell in a Cell’ match between The Undertaker and Mankind. The match happened many years after I stopped watching. One of the wonders of the modern world is that I can stop what I’m doing and then watch whatever it is that I’ve been reading or hearing about, usually on YouTube. The match is brutal; a complete health and safety nightmare. The fence-clad ‘cell’ that surrounds the ring starts to buckle under their weight, shortly before The Undertaker sends Mankind 22ft through the air into a table next to the ring below. After receiving medical attention, he climbs back up only to be ‘chokeslammed’ through one of the cell panels, falling a the same distance again, this time to the ring mat. From Wikipedia:

According to both Foley [Mankind], Calaway [The Undertaker] and Prichard [sic], the second bump through the cell roof was completely unplanned, Calaway would later say that he thought Foley was legitimately dead following the second fall, and asked Funk to check if he was still alive, while Foley would describe Ross’ commentary as “not part of a wrestling match, but a legitimate cry for my well-being”. Foley later said that the only reason he survived the fall was because he did not take the chokeslam properly, as he had been too exhausted to lift his body weight in response to the chokehold.

Somehow, Mankind gets up and they wrestle further, while one of his dislodged teeth hangs from his nose. Things get ridiculous when thumbtacks are scattered in the ring, and this gimmick is somewhat overshadowed by what went before. There is a brilliant summary and commentary on the match on YouTube which is well worth watching:

The podcast got me thinking about what I’d seen as a kid. Yes, wrestling was made up. But that doesn’t mean it wasn’t great. The wrestlers still had careers and reputations to nurture and build. Getting to win a belt was something agreed before a match finish, but generally you only got to be the winner of the best matches if you were popular and good at the job. The work had to be believable on TV, to the fans in the area and sometimes even right next to the crowd as they brawled. They wrestlers also had to record lots of TV spots, trash talking and gurning to the camera to keep the storylines going. Every time they got into the ring they were putting their trust in each other to make it great but also to keep it safe, and it didn’t always work out.

I worked hard to bring out the best in my opponents. I gratefully acknowledge the hundreds of wrestlers I worked with in thousands of matches over twenty-three years, and am proud that I never injured another wrestler to the point that he couldn’t work the next day. — Bret Hart

I started reading Hitman, Bret Hart’s autobiography, towards the end of my holiday in April. I thought that it would be some light reading to go with my vacation vibe. As an ebook, I didn’t realise it would be such a monster read at nearly 600 pages. I knew Hart as part of The Hart Foundation tag team back when I used to watch at the turn of the 1990s, but I hadn’t realised he’d gone on to much greater things including winning the WWF World Championship belt. The whole book was an education. Early on you are introduced to the wrestling lingo:

  • Babyface: A ‘good guy’ in the storyline.
  • Heel: A ‘bad guy’. A babyface could ‘turn heel’ as part of a story.
  • Kayfabe: To keep in character, even outside of the ring. Although the storylines were make-believe, nobody wanted to disappoint fans by being seen with their supposed arch-enemy on a tour bus or having a beer together.
  • Getting heat: When you’re a hot property or you’re having a great match, this is shorthand for adulation and frenzied fever from the fans or the crowd.
  • Putting someone over: Letting them win. Apparently the end of matches were decided by the person doing the booking, but the content of the matches themselves were down to the wrestlers.
  • Getting some juice: Secretly and deliberately cutting your forehead with a razor blade during a match in order to add blood to the proceedings. Apparently wrestlers would hide a blade in their mouth and then spit it out and cut themselves when they had taken a blow to the head.

Getting some juice seems to be something that happened a lot in the earlier years, but the promoters knew they had to try and curb it as wrestling became more mainstream. From Hitman:

Though I’d bladed when I thought it would increase the artistry of the match, the practice was clearly stupid, and stopping it was a step in the right direction to protecting wrestlers. What bothered me was that Vince banned blading four months too late. My forehead had so many deep cuts in it from our recent run of cage matches that I could easily pull the slices apart with my fingers. Pat Patterson later explained that the real concern was that AIDS could be spread by all that self-inflicted bleeding in the ring. I was relieved, and at the same time I felt bad for ever having done it.

Hart’s story is fascinating. His life in the business traces a route from the 1970s — where wrestling was fragmented across regions, with his dad Stu running the Stampede Wrestling promotion in Calgary, Alberta — to the turn of the millennium, where the World Wrestling Federation (WWF, now WWE) run by Vince McMahon was all-conquering. Hart was the eighth of twelve children, all of whom were involved or married into wrestling in one way or another. Their childhood home had a room in the basement that was nicknamed ‘The Dungeon’, where Stu would take pleasure in teaching ‘submission wrestling’ to anyone wanting to get started in the business.

The author comes across as sincere and honest, documenting his hectic schedule of life on the road and the impact that this had on his relationship with his family, as well as his womanising and his use of steroids. You get a good sense of how much work it was, and how much effort he had to put into keeping in great shape and ensuring he was earning a living. Hart is self-aware of his qualities, and has an intelligent understanding of what makes a great wrestler:

I have my own theory on the three qualities it takes to be a great pro wrestler. The first one is look or physical presence. On a scale of one to ten, Hogan, being such an awesome specimen, might rate a ten, for example. Although it always helped, it wasn’t as important to be tough as it was to look tough, especially if you were a heel. The second quality is the ability to talk, to sell yourself; Hogan might score another easy ten, whereas a guy like Dynamite would have to work to earn a two. The third is wrestling talent, the ability to work. Here it would be just the opposite: Hogan would rate the two and Dynamite would get the ten. A score in the high twenties adds up to a great wrestler.

Losing can be a beautiful thing if it’s done right. The Hitman character was generally seen as a wrestler who, try as he might, could never quite win. This made him more human than, say, Warrior or Hogan. His constant struggle to make it to the top was endearing to the fans because it was something they could identify with in their own lives.

Early in Hart’s career, he suffers a horrible injury at the hands of wrestler Dino Bravo. Although Hart could see that their planned move would have problems, it was difficult to stop the match and ‘break kayfabe’ in front of all the fans:

The referee, John Bonello, stepped between us, pushing him back, and it was while I was standing on the apron with my back to the crowd, knowing the spot was coming, that I realized it was quite some distance to the steel fence, that it was bolted to the floor and that it wasn’t going to budge when I hit it. But it was too late! Dino, right on cue, rushed the ropes and launched me backwards into the air. As if in slow motion I twisted and braced myself, but my foot was tangled in the cord from the mic stand, and I feared that it would catch and pull me downwards, head first into the fence. Somehow, in a millisecond, I was able to shake my foot free then—wham!—my chest hit the top of the fence, and I crumpled to the arena floor. In very real agony, I was unable to catch my breath. My first thought was, Don’t die, don’t die. It felt like I’d crushed my rib cage or maybe even punctured a lung. As I twisted around on the floor, nobody seemed to realize this wasn’t part of the show! I thought, Just hold on … somebody will know I’m seriously hurt. Oh no they won’t … my selling is realistic, so nobody realizes I can’t breathe. … I might die here on the floor of the Maple Leaf Gardens. God, what an awful way to go.

There seems to be little thought to wrestler wellbeing, such as ensuring they have an income if they are injured in a match. This is a theme that repeats throughout:

Vince’s generosity extended to $200 a week while I healed. Luckily my $10,000 SummerSlam 1989 cheque arrived to cover me. Still, I found myself going back to work after only eighteen days. My ribs would bother me for years, and I had to be careful taking hard falls and turnbuckles. There’s a certain art to being able to work hurt and not disappoint your fans. I’m proud to say that nobody noticed a thing.

These physical injuries culminate in an awful event where Hart’s brother Owen loses his life as he makes a vertical entrance to the ring:

Hanging from a cable off a catwalk up in the rafters of the arena, Owen suddenly fell seventy-eight feet to the ring, smashing chest-first across the ropes, about a foot from a turnbuckle, bouncing hard onto his back toward the middle of the ring. He lay there for several minutes turning blue while paramedics worked feverishly on him, to no avail.

It’s hard not to judge history by the standards of today. Looking back, it is so sad to know that there was no holistic support for the wrestlers. As well as getting little or no pay while they were off work due to physical injury, there was no support for the those who were battling mental issues and addictions. Wikipedia has a long page, filled with sorrow, documenting a list of premature professional wrestling deaths.

The impact of Owen’s loss on his family is deep, and causes significant rifts. At this point, a lot of the extended family’s income and future earnings is either directly or indirectly dependent on the company that now has a near-monopoly on the wrestling business. So the immediate pain splits into different views about how to approach Vince McMahon, the man who runs the business.

Bret has his own run-in with Vince McMahon. Due to various reasons covered in the book, Bret wasn’t happy with the decision that he should drop the world championship belt to Shawn Michaels before leaving the WWF to join the rival World Championship Wrestling. McMahon had agreed, but then during the match the bell was rung prematurely, causing Michaels to be declared the winner. I wasn’t familiar with this story before picking up the book, but it is apparently very famous, now known as The Montreal Screwjob. There’s an episode of the documentary series Dark Side of the Ring which covers this in a lot of detail.

What I found interesting is the ‘kayfabe’ side to the story. At the end of the match, Hart looks truly devastated, spitting on McMahon, writing the letters ‘WCW’ in the air and then smashes up some ringside gear. You wouldn’t typically expect the wrestler to acknowledge the existence of another wrestling promotion, nor McMahon’s role as a senior person involved with the incident. Backstage, McMahon goes to see Hart in his dressing room and is apparently knocked unconscious by him. From Wikipedia:

The far-reaching impact of the incident led to its adoption as a theme in matches and storylines of the WWF’s “Attitude Era” and the creation of the character of “Mr. McMahon,” the evil arrogant boss. Many wrestling fans, and several within the business, believe the entire incident was an elaborate work executed in collaboration with Hart. Nonetheless, Hart was ostracized from the WWF while McMahon and Michaels continued to receive angry responses from Canadian audiences for many years.

There’s some interesting detail on the incident in the excellent 1998 TV documentary Hitman Hart: Wrestling With Shadows which has been made available on YouTube:

With the advent of the Internet, ‘keeping kayfabe’ must have become almost impossible, with wrestling fans sharing stories with each other online about the real people behind the characters. It makes sense that the business would adapt to this, turning McMahon’s real-life role as the boss of the WWF into a storyline. Back in the days when I watched the show, McMahon was seen as just one of the match commentators and nothing more.

During the last few years that are covered by the book, Bret suffers a quick decline brought about by WCW’s poor management and terrible storylines, as well as his own serious injuries that start with concussion from a kick to the head and a subsequent stroke after falling off of his bike.

I’m really glad I read this. It put my brief spell as a wrestling fan into context and gave me a newfound appreciation for the work that they did. Yes, it wasn’t ‘real’. But we loved it.